It'a official

I really thought I was going to grow old in this house of mine.  It is no longer a possibility.  Tomorrow my friend Doris, a realtor is stopping by.  My house is going to be up for sale.  The last few years have not been all that great.  After being fired from a job had done for 25 years and loved, nothing has been the same.  Just as I thought I was finally getting back to who I really was, THE ACCIDENT HAPPENED.  And the job I have been doing for the last five years has evaporated.

It's not all bad.  My oldest daughter is expecting her second child and wants me to come and give her a hand with the kids and the house.  That is wonderful as I love my grandson and like taking care of him.  I would also do anything to help my children.  It just that when you think you have things settled, something happens.

I am realizing how much my life will change.  It is scary and I don't know if I can keep my sanity.  This old house had been my anchor.  It is my safe haven from the storms of life and soon it will be gone.  When I was younger facing a change in course simply meant that I would just have to figure out what to do and then do it.  Now I feel that I am stepping into a black hole.  I am afraid I won't come out the other end.

Okay, whine whine whine.  Get it together Carol, life will go on and you will be better when it's all done.
I started out on a mission this week but any change in my daily routing seems to throw me off.  My step son and kids were in town and it was great to see them but they threw me off.  I forgot to exercise yesterday and forgot my meds today.  Blade did get his walk and so did I.  I did cook real food, baked spaghetti.  I have made enough to either feed an army or me for about two weeks.  Not cooking for 6 people, something I can't get used to.

Mr. Belvedere. remember that TV show, that housekeeper that the family couldn't live without?  I have to practice that.  The one problem is that I hate housework.  I was a great mother and a fair cook but house work...has one of my more well honed talents.  Okay time to quit whining.  I feel better to just get it out.  The only thing is I hope I can take Blade with me.  Walking him tonight, I remembered I may not be able to take him with me.  How he would be missed.  He is my constant companion and best friend.  I would be lost without him.

My options right now are move to Georgia and stay
Go to Georgia temporarily to help while my daughter is on maternity leave and then go where?
Get a job her and don't go to Georgia for any reason
I guess I just don't know, I just don't know